As this abysmal show keeps moving forward, one must wonder what exactly it takes to write for a Brenda Hampton series. Perhaps the ingredients contain a healthy fear of the Father, unrealistic plots and plot holes as well as pseudo-edginess. Yes, that seems to fit for any one of the writers who continue writing for this trainwreck each week. But pondering their employment for too long will only bring out rage and despair. Instead, a recap.
Secret Life Episode 2 Recap
Anne's Tom Hanks-a-like boyfriend proposes to her after learning of her pregnancy. Adrian goes to Grace's to console her, but finds Grace so depressed from her father's death that she refuses to get out of bed. Tom tells Adrian that it was actually Adrian who killed their father because she made sex look fun. Amy argues with Ben over letting him watch John and goes psycho (yes, almost actually psycho) on Ben when he shows up to babysit. Anne and Amy come over to Grace's house to find George massaging Grace's mom's shoulders (apparently they were married many moons ago).
Anne accuses him of still loving her and moving in too fast. Adrian and Ricky have sex in a car (Ricky's presumably, because we all know Adrian is poor AND trampy) and then her dad catches them. He then decides to buy the family a house so they can all live together. Ben's dad proposes to Betty the Internet Prostitute (but she's apparently not told him of her working girl days). Amy continues to be a huge grump until Ben kisses her. She asserts she doesn't want to have sex any time soon, much to his chagrin. Grace and Tom have decided that Grace's sexual encounter was the cause of the death and Grace refuses to speak to anyone and tells Jack she doesn't love him any longer.
Low-Down
This whole show is sexist, but this episode really brought out the chauvinism. Not only do the characters continue to remark on Amy's breasts and that her t-shirts are too revealing, but attitude that having premarital sex brings about death and destruction sets the world back about 1,000 years. At one point Grace tells Amy "You had sex and got pregnant. I had sex and my dad died. We got what we deserved." Huh? And it keeps going when Ricky tells Ben he needs to tell Amy and not ask her for things because, you know, he is a man and Amy is a woman.
Secondly, why did Grace and Jack apparently go on the loudspeaker and tell the entire school they had sex? Or maybe they wrote it on their twitters, because the entire school seemed to know about her lost hymen before they knew about her dad. Then Jack comes waltzing in talking about the amazing sex the two of them had, to Grace's ex, Ricky no doubt. Ew.
Betty the Internet Prostitute looks like she's here to stay, but dialogue with her seems like they're talking to a brick wall. They've created a character with less than a brain cell and she's managed to capture the Sausage King's heart. Interesting. And the Sausage King seemed, well, one of the less moronic characters on the show. How will Papa Ben react when he hears about her sordid prostitute past?
Molly Ringwald is pregnant in real life, so her pregnancy being worked into the show is great. But she appears to grow several months between now and next episode. Okay. Well, these characters live in Brenda Hampton's reality and not, you know, reality.
And man, someone needs to have a talk with Tom. Dear Tom, sex is not bad! Sex doesn't kill third uninvolved parties. Sex is just...sex. Get over it. Wasn't he going to have sex with Tammy anyway like several episodes back? What a hypocrite.
Now Amy, our main character. This episode? What a bitch. She flipped out on Ben for wanting to babysit then flipped out on him later for not babysitting correctly. She flips out at everyone all of the time, so its difficult to believe she has a loving boyfriend and friends. Someone with all of those mood swings is going to die a crotchety an dried up old woman. Apparently, ABC Family is trying to show us the reality of teen motherhood. Yes, mood swings happen, but Amy needs a Xanex STAT.
Verdict
This epsiode was worst that the last one. Then again, each episode seems to be worse than the last one. Its ashame such a great premise was destroyed on such weak writing.
WHAT: Secret Life of the American Teenager
WHEN: 8pm, Monday Evenings
WHERE: ABC Family
WHO: Starring: Molly Ringwald, Shailene Woodley, Daren Kagasoff, Ken Bauman, Francia Raisa, India Eisley, Megan Park, Steve Schirripa and Mark Derwin Produced by: Brenda Hampton
HOW: Who Knows
RUN TIME: 1 hour each episode
